


Crimes, Misdemeanors and Current Boyfriends

by Fiercest



Category: The Mindy Project
Genre: 3x04, Canon Compliant, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-05
Updated: 2014-10-05
Packaged: 2018-02-19 22:56:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2405960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fiercest/pseuds/Fiercest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Missing moments during 3x04. Cliff is coming between Mindy and Danny. Only one of them is worried.</p>
<p>Pure fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crimes, Misdemeanors and Current Boyfriends

“My toothbrush and brush?” Mindy asks in confusion while staring at her stern faced boyfriend. He was holding up her toiletries in a sandwich bag.

 

He’s being a little ridiculous. And on some level she hopes he realizes this. He had better also realize what a truly big sacrifice this is for her.

 

Usually, at this point in the relationship- timeline wise –her crap would be everywhere. It might as well be her apartment. It was generally her kind of hint that she felt comfortable with him and that she considered them serious. At _this_ level of seriousness this actually would be her apartment, _their_ apartment, whatever. But she wasn’t pushing. She really and truly wasn’t. It was a miracle that she had contained herself to a brush and toothbrush! He should really be thanking her and appreciating her subtlety and picking up of his cues.

 

Danny has always liked his space. Mindy understands that. She also respects it (when it is convenient for her). She doesn’t push. Much.

 

Okay, fine, so against his express wishes she hides her stupid sandwich bag of necessities but what the hell was she supposed to do?! She hasn’t been home in a week. Did he want her to use his, or show up to the practice and see patients with morning breath? Maybe he did want her to- wait no, that wasn’t it.

 

* * *

 

 

So maybe he’s being a little excessive.

 

He loves her so much and he sort of can’t stop touching her whenever she’s around. And it’s not even always about her butt anymore. He likes the feeling of walking into the elevator with his fingers laced with hers, it might as well be a neon sign telling everyone what was happening in his life! He likes to brush her hair behind her ear on the rare occasion when she’s embarrassed and not meeting his eyes. He loves framing her face in his hands and staring into her eyes. Danny Castellano really _really_ loves Mindy Lahiri.

 

And it’s freaking him out a little. He’s being more overt than he’s ever been (he’s sure it’s Mindy’s influence). He’s sickening. He’s wrapped around her little finger! And he’s giving her all this time, attention, focus and care.

 

He’s terrified that it’s all going to scare her away.

 

Danny has witnessed a good 90% of her past relationships. She’s never been with a man as much in love with her as he is and she’s definitely never been with someone who showed it so openly.

 

Danny Castelanno is the only person in the world who thinks these things, because it’s all completely relative to him.

 

He’d be happy to know that from the outside looking in he’s as cool as a cucumber. No one would ever mistake him for gushy, or peg him as the kind of guy who writes crummy poetry about his girlfriend’s _ahem_ flower. No one’s the wiser about how he actually feels and sometimes they’re not 100% positive he even likes his current girlfriend.

 

Then again, no ones 100% positive he’s liked any of his girlfriends.

 

But Danny’s been making a genuine effort to deserve her. So his pendulum is naturally swinging the other way and now he can’t bring himself down.

 

* * *

 

 

_Damn it Mindy._

He’s pacing back and forth in his office, waiting for her meeting with Cliff to be through.

 

So she’s talking to her ex-boyfriend, asking him for a _favor_. That means nothing. He’s not worried, not one bit. He’s a self-assured man. A man’s man. He has no time for this sissy wondering bullshit. Except-

 

Why was it taking so long?

 

Eventually, he hears her voice announcing her arrival and leaves his office, briefcase in hand, trying not to look too eager to leave, or like he’d been waiting for her.

 

It was just a coincidence.

 

“All done. Ready to go, babe?”

 

He shrugs nonchalantly and follows her to the elevators.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“There’s a small catch.”

 

“Ok.”

 

“Cliff is still very upset that I cheated on him-“ she gestures at his torso and tries not to be distracted by his tight black t-shirt, “With you. So I told him we’d broken up.”

 

“You did _what?!”_ The panic sets in immediately. “Why would you do that? What’s wrong with you?!” Okay so maybe cool as a cucumber wasn’t so great if it meant your girl wasn’t the wiser either. He wonders if this is going to become one of those weird seduction schemes she used to concoct and sincerely hopes she realizes that that isn’t gonna fly while she’s with him (so ever again). She says it’s only for a couple days though, so that should be fine right? Right.

 

Danny tries to regain control of the situation by adopting what Richie lovingly refers to as his ‘dad voice’. “Two days, but that’s it.”

 

And she _thanks_ him. Wow. He’s thinking about all the ways he can trade in these brownie points when the soft press of her lips to his cheek brings him back to reality.

 

“Now get in the bedroom.” He smiles crookedly at her and she’s got her sexy eyes in, pressing all up against his chest…

 

And he really just wants to hang out with her. Not that he isn’t a fan of their excursions on the washing machine, under the piano and in Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum, he just feels like he could use the upper hand today. And denying Mindy her nookie is a surefire way of riling her up. “Don’t get excited; we’re folding socks and watching JAG.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Know what I’m really in the mood for?” murmurs Mindy into Danny’s shoulder. It’s three in the morning and they’re curled around each other, the bedding has long since been thrown to the floor and she’s tracing indiscernible doodles across his chest. His long square fingers are doing the same to the chilly skin of her back. “Some Italian sausage.”

 

Danny groans, “Is this you asking me to cook for you? Because you hate Italian food. You complain about it all the time.”

 

She playfully curls his chest hair around her little finger. “I guess I just hadn’t had _the real thing_ yet, y’know? I’m allowed to change my mind.”

 

“I swear to god Mindy, if you had it at that Bistro on 12th I’m kicking you out of bed, that place is _not_ Italian food.”

 

Mindy rolls her eyes. Her pink tongue darts out to lick her full, dark lips. “No, I’m talking about _your_ sausage.”

 

“I don’t remember ever making-“

 

“I’m telling you I wanna suck your dick Danny, _god_.”

 

One day he’ll get it.

 

* * *

 

 

“You cheated on her Danny, I’d say it’s a big deal,” Cliff snarks at him like he’s got some sort of moral high ground. Like he’s better than him!

 

Danny is beyond outrage at this point. He whirls around to give Mindy the biggest silent shitstorm she’s ever received but she unhelpfully just mouths silent apologies and excuses at him. _WHAT THE HELL MINDY. I WOULD NEVER._ He mouths back as a point of pride.

 

They stand awkwardly clumped in the elevator in total silence.

 

When Deslaurier comes through the doors he’s the last person Danny wants to see at that moment. “There’s a very strange energy in this elevator.”

 

“They broke up,” Cliff pipes up smugly from behind him.

 

“I attacked a woman in the park,” he has to fight to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

 

“Can’t say I’m surprised.” 

 

* * *

 

 

“You’re **_MARRIED_** _?”_ she demands in a tone that reads bold, italisized and underlined fury.

 

“What, you know I’m annulled!”

 

He pretends not to hear her dismiss that as not actually meaning anything.

 

Well, at least he knows she’s got principles. No married men. Great.

 

* * *

 

“You actually have something I want,” drawls Cliff smugly over his tented fingers. Danny’s eyes shift to the bottom of Cliff’s shoes, which are propped up on the desk. He wonders if he can break his leg and make it look like an accident.

 

“You talking about Mindy?” He asks, voice squeaking with disbelief.

 

“I’m talking about something that’s had a few more men on top of her.”

 

Danny pauses and takes a deep breath. He counts to ten in his head. He counts to twenty. On the island you do not let guys just go around insulting your girl. That’s just not how it’s done there. You defend her honor and you defend yours. As a man. And ooooh was Cliff asking for it. While what he was implying wasn’t strictly untrue, it was incredibly rude to suggest that his girlfriend’s failures along the way of her quest for true love were somehow shameful. _Fuck this guy, I’m gonna punch him in his goddamn face_.

 

“I want the chair Danny.”

 

_Yeah, I’ll give you a chair. To the goddamn face_. But then he thinks about the Practice, the inevitable paperwork, how the guy’s a lawyer and that could suck; and slowly he regains his faculties.

 

But if he insults Mindy Lahiri anywhere near him ever again, then Staten rules apply. 

 

* * *

 

There is no way they had a better relationship than he does with her. It’s just not possible. But there it is, sticking in his head like one of her stupid upbeat songs sung by a teenage girl. _When Mindy and I were going strong her stuff was everywhere_.

 

And wasn’t that just so Mindy? She was loud, exciting and overbearing at times. She was a tiny person who had a huge presence and every space she occupied reflected who she was. Her office was painted in bright pastels and there was a bowl full of gummy vaginas on her desk for God’s sake!

 

She was inconsiderate of other people’s space and privacy. She liked to get right up in everyone’s business. She liked to care. And was that really so wrong? This is how she gets close to people: by sharing their space.

 

He can deal with that. He can meet her halfway.

 

* * *

 

“Was he this much of a jerk when I dated him?” Mindy sighs a melancholy sigh and flops back onto his bed, clutching her damp towel to her chest.

 

“Well you did cheat on him Min,” resigns Danny while toweling his hair off in front of his underwear drawer.

 

“Actually, I’ve been thinking about it,” ( _Oh boy)_ , “And I think I actually cheated on you with him.”

 

“But you said-!”

 

“Ok, calm down Godfather. I mean- we were broken up. He dumped me, shock of shocks, and then we,” she gestures suggestively between them. “It was implied that we were in a thing. And then suddenly he was at my apartment and had decided that we were a thing again. But I already had a thing with you! And I tried to tell him that our things could not intersect-”

 

“Can you not phrase it like that?

 

“But he wouldn’t listen.” She sighs again, “Vince and Owen strike again.”

 

“You think it was your boobs that made him want to be with you?”

 

“Hey! I have amazing cans, they’re capable of sorcery.”

 

He nods and with theatrical emphasis closes his underwear drawer without picking anything out. “They’re definitely capable of a lot,” Danny assures her.

 

He prowls closer, swinging his hips to an unheard beat. The tiny green towel was hanging real low on his hips and would totally have fallen off on it’s own had _ahem_ something not changed the fit and tented it outward.

 

Danny crawls over her and smiles a heart stopping, panty-dropping smile. He leans down and Mindy thinks he’s going to go for her neck and utterly ravish her. But he kisses her sweetly on the cheek. “I think I can deal with that. I have you to myself now.”

 

“ _Yeah,_ you do.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is such utter nonsense. I tried to capture what I felt like their innervoices would be, but it came off a little odd. Hope you enjoyed it anyway!


End file.
